Identity

I've been reading some interesting adoption blogs lately. A common thread I've seen is a discontent (I'd even go so far as to say anger in a lot of cases) of adult adoptees. These issues really stem with a crisis of identity. In no way to I want to discredit real, honest feelings of adoptees. But I must question some of what I have read.

I've seen this angst particularly with cross cultural adoptions. They are angry with their parents for taking them from their culture. I have even (repeatedly) seen comments like "I wish I would have stayed in the orphanage with people who look like me rather than be adopted and taken away from my heritage." I've also seen people make generalized statements that if parents can't put a child in a school with a certain percentage of (whatever ethnicity...I'll say Asian) students, those parents have no business adopting. So...a child is better off in an orphanage than in a small town? I've even seen one (I'm sure well-meaning) adult adoptee twist Scripture and cast curses on those who would "rip a child from his mother's womb."

Are there still problems with adoption? YES. Would a child be best with biological parents? If at all possible (but not necessarily always...look at our foster care system.) But I also know that international adoption today is not like it was 30 years ago.

I really do feel for these adult adoptees who are struggling with identity issues. It makes me a bit anxious for what Dayna will face as an adult. I certainly hope that she won't hate me because we adopted her and brought her to small-town Nebraska.

But then I think...if anyone is searching for their identity outside of Christ, they will always be disappointed. I KNOW that adoption is a good thing. I know that it is a Biblical thing. And if God has orchestrated the hearts of countless officials, sometimes literally moving heaven and earth to unite families, then adoption must be part of His plan for the lives of so many people.

And so I pray for wisdom for myself, and contentment in an identity grounded in Christ for these unhappy people.

Do I have all the answers? Absolutely not. But I'm so glad I know the One who gave us all the answers.