Just Because You Can...

...doesn't mean you should.

A few weeks ago, we went camping at our favorite local campground. We are usually the only people there (maybe 3 or 4 other sites taken in the entire campground), but this time, at least 2/3 of the campground was full. It's on a quiet lake...no motors allowed. The facilities are primitive (pit toilets). It's really a peaceful, lazy spot to get away for a little bit.

Until our recent trip. One of the campers near us kept his generator running well past midnight. Then, bright and early (around 6am), he started it up again. So, I'm awake long before I planned, and stumbled bleary-eyed to the nearest hole in the ground. On the way, the "gentleman" with the generator let his little yapper dog chase me down and start licking and sniffing me. I raised an eyebrow and mentioned that it was pretty early. He seemed oblivious, so I asked if the generator was necessary at that hour. He looked at his watch and said "It's legal." He went on to tell me that in a campground with no hookups, you can run a generator 24/7 if you want. He even dared me to call the Sheriff and ask. I did call the Sheriff's office to confirm this. I was told that Nebraska campgrounds had no quiet hours, and that people go camping to party all night long.

Despite the assertions of this horribly arrogant man and the local sheriff's office, I discovered that Nebraska campgrounds do indeed have quiet hours, and they extend to generators, regardless of the availability of electricity in the campground.

So, once I got past the grumpiness of the early morning wake-up call, I realized that this was the perfect teachable moment for Dayna (who slept until 9:30, by the way) that just because you CAN do something, doesn't mean you SHOULD.

What many people consider to be their rights are really responsibilities. We had a lovely time around our breakfast table brainstorming things that may be allowed but aren't necessary.

Hero Training Camp

This summer at church, we're doing a new kind of VBS. It's called "Hero Training Camp." On Sunday mornings, while the kiddos are learning how to be superheroes for God, the parents are learning how to raise superheroes.

Since we've started this program, I've noticed Dayna is much more eager to lend a hand and help out without being asked. For example, a few weeks ago, we were having a tough morning getting started (okay...I was having a tough morning getting started) and there was a lot of nagging going on about getting Dayna's bed made. After the umpteenth time, I went upstairs to check on her, only to notice that she had made my bed as well. When she is asked to do something, it is the rule, not the exception that she does so with a cheerful attitude. On the rare occasion (now) that she doesn't respond cheerfully, she catches herself and fixes the attitude on her own.

It's been wonderful watching Dayna desire and learn to be a hero. She's learning how to praise God through her work and bless others. I've seen her be less selfish and more thoughtful.

I don't know that I've become much more of a superhero's mom, but I'm sure hoping that these positive changes will begin to impact my parenting as well.

That's What Mommies Do

It's been a rough few days at the Wilson house...mostly due to lack of wisdom in parenting and lack of self-control in childhood. So, as Dan & I pray about how to handle this latest phase (please God, let this just be a phase!) I think back to one of Dayna's favorite phrases when we ask why she does something..."That's what Daynas do!"

So this morning, I popped this little poem in Dayna's lunchbox:

I will love you when you're grumpy.

I will love you when you're mad.

I will love you when you're happy.

I will love you when you're sad.

I will love you when you're snuggly,

And when you're mean and argue too.

I will ALWAYS love my Dayna,

Because that's what Mommies do!

If I Ran the Zoo

I just ran across this list while cleaning up today. It brought back some smiles.

A few months back, Dayna decided that she thought life would be better if kids got to make the rules. So we humored her and made a list of rules she would make or change.

1. There would be no consequences.

2. We should paint colors on the walls and not have things be boring white.

3. It should be okay to be sneaky.

4. We should keep our mouths closed when chewing.

5. We should be able to have snacks whenever we want, and when we're full, we're full.

6. We should be able to go to bed whenever we feel like it.

7. We shouldn't have to do chores until we want.

8. We should do what we want when we want to do it.

9. We shouldn't do anything we don't want to do.

Well, we discussed each new rule and what it might look like. For instance, with #3, how would we feel if someone was sneaky in the middle of the night and took our car. If we followed #1, then there would be no consequences for the person to took it. Then we remembered the Mrs. Piggle Wiggle books that we read a few years back. In them, there were some very interesting natural consequences for eating what you want when you want, sleeping when you want, etc. Dayna decided some of those rules weren't very good, either.

Then Dayna grabbed a pen and started crossing off the rules she decided weren't very good after all. We're left with #2 and #4. Daddy & I agreed they were pretty good rules. You know, we've never really had a problem with any of us chewing with our mouths open, and I'm sick of the boring white walls, too.

Guess what Dan & I will be doing over spring break? Here's a clue: "Seacliff" and "Mandolin String." (Who comes up with the color names, anyway?)

Being Chinese

Dayna has been preoccupied lately with being different at school. She is particularly sensitive to comments about her nose. (You can read about that here.) It's worth pondering that 1 out of 5 people in the world is Chinese, but she's the only one in our town.

Earlier this week, Dan & I were able to share with her class (and the other Kindergarten classes as well) about Chinese New Year. We read some books, she sang a song, and I taught the entire Kindergarten a song I learned in China. We finished it off by giving red envelopes with chocolate coins to her classmates.

It was something else to watch Dayna shine. She wore her red silk Chinese dress and was instantly bombarded with all sorts of compliments from her classmates. They were truly interested in Chinese New Year and some of the traditions that go along with it.

The look on her face was priceless. And, though we know this may all change again tomorrow, she was proud to be Chinese and be just a little bit different from everyone else. Hopefully this is a lesson in how EVERYBODY is special and has something to offer, and that we can celebrate our differences and appreciate our unique individuality.

It's difficult to watch your little one struggle with her identity, and I'm sure we're going to fail her in this area. I can only trust that she continues to love who she is...nose and all!

Facing the Music

Dayna had a little trouble at school yesterday...nothing major, enough to lose her "green card." This is the first time she has been in trouble at school , and you could tell it was really bothering her.

When I picked her up from school, she told me that she needed to talk to me, but had to wait until Daddy came home. Once he came home, she took us each by the hand and sat us down in the living room for a "family meeting." At this point, she confessed what had happened. You could tell that it was eating her up inside. Inwardly, Dan & I were cheering, because we were seeing the conviction of the Holy Spirit working in her little life.

She did learn that consequences at school equal consequences at home, but she also learned that her honesty would result in a smaller consequence than if we had found out from her teacher. She paid those consequences, and wrote a letter of apology to the teacher she didn't obey.

It did my heart so much good to see her take responsibility for herself. I saw huge steps in the development of her character yesterday, and it makes me so proud to see the little girl she is becoming.

Life Lesson...What Would You Do?

Dayna has been saving her money, and recently chose to buy some alphabet beads at the craft store. She wanted to make "BFF" necklaces with a friend at school.

Imagine our disappointment to open the alphabet beads to discover that it was 80% filled with the letter X, M, W, or Z.

The package of 85 beads didn't even include the whole alphabet.

So...is this a life lesson in disappointment, or should I go buy her some more beads?

What would you do?