Wilson24-15

My Birthday Present

2012-02-05T11:29:00.001-08:00

I saw the sweetest idea at a craft store in Oregon over Christmas. My dear mom bought me (almost) all the things I needed to make this fun craft.

You can find directions here. I opted to make the magnetic dates from large glass stones with the scrapbook paper/dates mod-podged onto the back before gluing on the magnets.

I love that the acrylic sheet on the front is dry-erase so I can change the month and write any important dates I need.
Thanks for the birthday gift, Mom! It was a lot of fun.

Lessons I'm Learning - Part Seven (Sing)

2012-02-05T10:41:00.001-08:00

God's been teaching me this one for awhile. When I don't feel like it, I have to sing. I even made a tea mug to remind me. Out of the blue, a friend of mine sent me a necklace in December. She didn't really know why she was supposed to send it to me, but God must have known.

Then we sang a song in choir at church simply titled "Sing." (I confess I didn't really like the song at first...but it did grow on me.) One morning, in the midst of my anxiety and the unknown, I heard that same song on the radio when my alarm went off...I had never heard it on the radio before, but it must have been placed on that station at that time just for me...a reminder to sing.

So, while "Sing" has been the command God keeps giving...He has been whispering another word: "Hope." I was given a farewell gift of a stuffed pig from one of my students. I brought it home and was telling someone that she needed a name. I thought it would be appropriate to name the pig after the student who gave it to me. I was asked, "What was her name?" The answer: Hope. What a fitting name. Since then, God keeps whispering "Hope" in my ear...I don't know if that's hope for me, or hope that I should bring to my new situation (or maybe both!?!)

A few weeks ago, we sang a new song at church. It was catchy...I liked it...that was about it.

I'm no longer surprised that God speaks to me first thing in the morning through the song on my radio alarm...but I've moved past the point of listening for a little bit before hitting the snooze button. This week brought another major setback in my situation. The next day, in the 2.7 seconds it took me to hit the snooze button, I heard these words: "The peace that passes understanding is my song." Those words got stuck in my head all day. I remembered the melody to the rest of the song, but couldn't remember the words. I also figured that since I just recently heard the song at church, it would be a few more weeks before I'd hear it again.

I was wrong. That song was in this morning's worship service. Tears streamed down my face as I sang these words:

My hope is in You Lord, all the day long
I won't be shaken by drought or storm
A peace that passes understanding is my song
and I sing my hope is in You alone

I found two different YouTube videos when I came home. The first simply shows the lyrics.

The second comes with a tissue advisory:

Sometimes our trials don't have happy endings. I just pray that God is being glorified through mine.

What Lies Ahead

2012-02-04T06:49:00.001-08:00

My Ears Are Bleeding

2012-01-31T18:34:00.000-08:00

Lessons I'm Learning - Part Six (Celebrate)

2012-01-31T16:29:00.000-08:00

Today, I'm celebrating small accomplishments. 2 days in a row of classes who are figuring out what is expected of them, and that if they follow those expectations, good things happen. I was able to scour the bargain bins at Target tonight to reward 2 classes. As soon as the other classes learned that they could get prizes (because yes...I've resorted to a form of bribery), they started to shape up. I even had a class earn 15 extra recess minutes because they pulled it together in music.

The icing on my cupcake today was seeing a former colleague after school at a 6th grade basketball game and getting a HUGE hug and the promise of continued prayers on my behalf.

Not to say that there won't be more bad days...I'm sure there will. But today, I'm celebrating the good.

Lessons I'm Learning - Part Five (Tears)

2012-01-30T19:29:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, you just have to cry. I thought I was done shedding tears, but I'm not. Somehow, they just keep coming. I don't know that there's much more I can add to these thoughts...just let the tears wash through my soul and keep me going for another day. I know that God counts every tear I shed...I pray that somehow these can bring Him glory as I continue to trust Him in the dark.

Lessons I'm Learning - Part Four (Showing Up)

2012-01-29T18:43:00.000-08:00

This new chapter is hard. Incredibly hard. I end up in tears most days...sometimes by lunch. I know in my heart that I am a good teacher, but right now, I'm not teaching. I'm disciplining. Often. And usually not very well. I made the mistake of finally getting around to reading the farewell cards my former students wrote for me. They were incredibly touching. 2 boys bought me iTunes gift cards with their own money. Another girl wrote the lyrics to a song I taught last year (Red River Valley): From this valley they say you are going / I shall miss your bright eyes and sweet smile / for alas, you have taken the sunshine / that has brightened my pathway awhile. Another boy who sat for years doing nothing in music class told me "when you go, the fun leaves, too." (His card was quite possibly one of the longest things he's written at school...writing has not been his strong suit, and like music, he has spent years avoiding it.) I sat crying at the memory of so many kids whose lives were changed...kids I truly loved, and who loved me back. Then I thought about the new kids...many who don't seem to even want to give me a chance; who are pushing me away and not letting me love them.

The face of one sweet 5th grade boy from my last school keeps coming across my mind. He took my departure particularly hard. For many reasons that I can't really share here, he holds a very special place in my heart. I realized that I didn't make a difference to him overnight. I just kept showing up. It wasn't always easy. He wasn't always easy. But I kept showing up, and eventually, made a difference.

And so for these new students who don't want to give me a chance, I just need to keep showing up. God can't use me if I don't. It won't happen overnight...and honestly, after 3 weeks, I'm not seeing much progress. I honestly wonder if anything will change in the next 14 weeks. But it won't get better if I don't show up. Sometimes God grows us while we're plodding along.

Lessons I'm Learning - Part Three (Detour)

2012-01-25T17:02:00.001-08:00

I guess this lesson is a no-brainer. We make plans. God laughs. My goal was to teach at a school for 7 years so I could see kids from Kindergarten through 6th grade. I was heartbroken years ago when I was unexpectedly moved after the last day of school in a building where I had taught for 6 years. I just missed seeing my first group of Kindergarten students through.

This year, I was so excited to be spending my seventh year in a building. Little did I know in August that I'd only make it to 6 1/2.

None of this makes sense. And I will drive myself crazy trying to figure it out. What I do know is that this is not a surprise to God. For whatever reason, I needed to either a) leave the last situation; b) make an impact on someone in my new location; c) let God change me; or d) all of the above.

I don't know why my life has suddenly taken this crazy turn. The detour is making me carsick. But...I can't look back. God decisively closed the door on that chapter of my life. I take with me mostly good memories...and the bad ones...I'm slowly finding that I can let them go.

And so I look ahead and keep my eyes on the road before me. It's still steep and full of rocks and obstacles, but I'm slowly finding my pace again and learning to celebrate small victories.

Hair

2012-01-21T20:09:00.001-08:00

Dayna is smitten with the Jackson 5 right now. For Christmas, she spent her own money to get her dad a "Best of the Jackson 5" CD. The other night, she was looking at the CD cover and asked her dad why they all wore their hair in an "alfredo."

Lessons I'm Learning - Part Two (Friends)

2012-01-21T18:35:00.000-08:00

As Dan & I have been watching "The Wonder Years" on Netflix lately, the theme song (based on the Beatles tune) has been stuck in my brain.

In the last month, God has surrounded me with friends I don't really deserve. I guess that's called grace. I don't know how I will ever be able to repay these people, they have truly been "Jesus with skin on."

One friend gave up the better part of 2 days (one while her parents were here from the West Coast) to drive me into Omaha and document my meetings with HR. She was able to give me objective feedback, prayer support, and practical encouragement.

Another friend gave me her home for a day so I wouldn't be alone. Together we drank tea, talked, cried, wrapped presents, I cut out a sewing project on her kitchen table...I was able to find retreat. She then arranged a lunch date for myself and her daughter (due to give birth at any moment...a good thing I didn't know she was having contractions while we were out!)

Two friends (fellow music teachers) showed up on a Wednesday after work and started to box up my classroom. Two more friends from my church in Lincoln came to Omaha on Friday with more boxes, chocolate, and ears. Together, they helped me turn the emotional task of packing 7 years of memories into a time of closure and a step toward healing.

I went way over our cell phone minutes for the month with friends who offered advice, counsel, Scripture, or just listened to my heart (and my tears, and my sniffles and nose blowing.)

The countless people I never spoke with, but were praying nonetheless...one even sent me a tea bag squeezer, knowing how much I love my tea :)

And while I'm probably forgetting many people, I can't leave out my family. My Oregon family who let me escape for awhile. The ones who have sometimes had hard things to tell me. The ones who keep picking up the phone, even though I have nothing new to tell them. My husband who allowed me to go over those cell phone minutes and didn't put up *too* much of a fuss about the bill. A man who graciously stepped aside and let the women in my life help me with "estrogen therapy." A man who told me upon the transition "Don't worry about the house for a few weeks. I've got everything covered." (And he did a great job! Although I do think it's time to step back into the real world again...we're down to mac & cheese or waffles for dinner now.) A man who prayed and listened, and let me rant. And then there's the daughter. The one who told me a story about a stressed out mommy who missed her students and had tough new schools. The mommy who was visited by an angel who told her "do not be afraid. God's holding you in His hand." The daughter who would slip notes under the bedroom door saying "Always know Jesus loves you" or "Dear Mom, remember God loves you! G+A=<3"

And while I know that God alone is all I need, He also knew how much I would need to know I'm loved and see my value through the eyes of my friends.

Lessons I'm Learning - Part One (Darkness)

2012-01-16T11:22:00.000-08:00

I'm learning that sometimes the path is very, very dark.
I'm learning that sometimes God grows our faith by letting us see what's going on, and sometimes He grows our faith by not letting us see.
I'm learning that I'd rather walk in the dark with Jesus than walk in the light on my own.
I'm learning that even the darkness is not dark to God.
I'm learning that His Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.
I'm learning that when you fix your eyes on Jesus, the things of earth grow strangely dim.
I'm learning that I'm afraid of the dark. I never thought I was...but this is a different kind of dark.
I'm learning that I'm surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses who know what it's like to walk in the dark. (To quote Rich Mullins...one of the best songwriters of all time {although King David was also pretty cool} once wrote: Sometimes I wake up in the night and feel the dark/it's so hot inside my soul, I swear there must be blisters on my heart)
I don't need to find light on my own. Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light. (Micah 7:8)

So I'm learning to trust, moment by moment.

This Month in a Nutshell

2012-01-16T11:05:00.000-08:00

This last month, a lot of things came to a head. I'm still not sure how to process everything, but since this blog is really more my journal than anything, I think I need to start getting my thoughts down so I can see God's faithfulness in the future.

Strange things have happened this school year. I think that's about all I can safely say on the Internet. Once I thought the hurtful chapter was over, I was wrong. False allegations were raised against me; my character was questioned. Ultimately, I was given 3 days to say goodbye to 750 students and close out 3 schools and start over the next week with 2 new schools and 750 new students. This entire saga was drawn out for almost 4 weeks with no answers (over the Christmas holiday), and wrought havoc on my anxiety-prone soul. (For the record, this is not the holiday weight-loss plan I'd advise for anyone.)

Satan has had a field day with me and my family. Yet God has been speaking...sometimes in a whisper, and sometimes in a reverberating shout. The next few posts will walk through some of the lessons I'm learning.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life

2012-01-07T18:32:00.000-08:00

It's been an incredibly tough month, and I hope to process everything and write about it soon.

But yesterday marked the end of a lot of things for me. I've been incredibly sad this week trying to process everything.

When I turned on the radio, this was the song I heard:

This is the first day of the rest of my life; 'cause even in the dark, I can still see the light; it's gonna be all right.

2011 in Review

2011-12-31T10:19:00.000-08:00

Just some highlights from our year.

In January, Dayna started coming to grips with her Chinese identity.

Dayna entered Ashland's Fine Arts Festival in February.

March brought about some home improvements.

In April, Dayna took a trip to space.

May ushered in life with a six-year-old.

Dayna had a minor outpatient procedure in June and discovered how much she loves surgery.

In July, Papa and Nana came for a visit and enjoyed the Stir-Up Days festivities in town.

August brought us a new school year, with a surprisingly easy transition (the year has since brought many more challenges than we could have foreseen, but it's important to remember the good times, as well.)

We had some great conversations with Dayna about heaven in September.

October was Pumpkin Patch season! We had a lot of fun, but enjoyed having Dan back when the month ended.

November was Adoption Awareness Month. We celebrated Orphan Sunday at church with a video and children's choir.

In December, we went to Oregon for Christmas and saw many friends and family members; a special treat was meeting my great-niece Claire.

Looking forward to seeing what 2012 has in store.

Running Blindfolded

2011-12-30T13:38:00.000-08:00

I don't even really know where to begin this post. It has been a difficult few years, and I'm weary. There really isn't a better word for it than that.

God's been showing me that I'm in a race, and there's going to be a fork in the road. But I'm not there yet. Until then, I need to keep persevering and running the race. One foot in front of the other. (Hebrews 12) He's also showing me that I'm not racing alone. I'm surrounded by friends and family who are praying for me and cheering me each step along the way.

But some recent events have changed up the course. Suddenly, the race took a turn up a very steep hill.
Some large boulders were thrown in my path. The road is twisting and turning, and I didn't train for this. To add further difficulty to this race, I feel like a huge, dark blindfold has been thrown on me.
I have no idea what my life will look like on Monday. I'm sitting here with no answers, and it's dark and scary. My anxiety is through the roof. I don't know how to run blindfolded.

And my mom quietly reminds me that "even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you." (Psalm 139:12) And so, I take hold of Jesus' hand and keep putting one foot in front of the other. It's still steep. And rocky. And hard. I'm slowing my pace and trusting Him.

When the Wilson Boys Get Together...

2011-12-30T13:32:00.000-08:00

...you never know what will happen.

They look like such sweet daddies to their little girls.

Even showing them the finer points of retail shopping.

Like the "Goodbye Mall" song and dance.

Dayna doesn't look overly impressed.

But do you see that awesome orange travel mug? Perfect for tea!

Meeting a "Real" Friend

2011-12-29T14:18:00.000-08:00

I have a great network of friends through the internet. It's always fun to get to meet people in person and turn your "pretend" friends into "real" friends.

While in Portland, I finally met up with my cyber friend, Kris. She brought her daughter Kaara to meet us at a mall in Portland on the day after Christmas (maybe not the best time and place to meet!) Kaara and Dayna had a blast playing in the play area while Kris and I got to visit for about an hour.

Hooray for "real" friends!

Who Can Resist Cute Baby Pictures?

2011-12-29T11:36:00.000-08:00

Yup...that's Claire. The darling daughter of my sweet niece Ashleigh. 6 months on Christmas Day! This was my first chance to meet her.

And if you like cute baby pictures, or want to see some AWESOME DIY projects, check out Ashleigh's blog.

Dreaming of a Wet Christmas

2011-12-29T11:31:00.000-08:00

Three years ago, we were snowed in...it was, quite honestly, one of the worst Christmases ever. This year, we were in Oregon again. It was a wet Christmas...and we were okay with that! (And yes...the grass IS greener in Oregon.)

So happy dreaming...
So...this one technically isn't dreaming...but movie snuggles are pretty cool, too!

Happy Birthday, Dan

2011-12-28T21:51:00.000-08:00

I wrote last year (click here) about our Angel Food cake tradition for Dan's birthday. This year, I thought it would be wise to have Dayna learn the fine art of making her dad's cake.

We started by separating the eggs.
Then we added the sugar and flour that had been sifted (six times!)
Then we bake it, put it on a pretty cake plate, and have Dayna pose in her Cindy Lou Who pajamas.
Homemade angel food cake = one happy Dad!

Asking the Right Question

2011-12-14T15:52:00.000-08:00

Thirteen years ago, Dan took me to an extremely romantic restaurant (Godfather's Pizza), ordered me a gourmet meal (Taco Pizza), arranged pre-dinner entertainment (a game of Gin), and asked me a question.

I'm so glad I gave him the right answer.

...and I'd say yes again! (and again and again and again)

Love you, Dan!

Pajama Run

2011-12-09T15:25:00.000-08:00

Last night we brought back a yearly tradition. When Dayna least expects it, we put her to bed, get into our own Christmas-y jammies, make up some hot cocoa, then wake her up (quite noisily.)

It's time for a

PAJAMA RUN!!!

On a Pajama Run, we get in the car with our pajamas and cocoa, and drive around to look at Christmas lights. We make a point of counting how many Nativities we can see, and talk about how Jesus came to be the Light of the World.

What kind of fun Christmas traditions do you keep at your house?

Referral Day!

2011-12-08T17:57:00.000-08:00

Six years ago today, I was sent an email. "There's a little girl I think you might want to see" was the message from Tiffany. She was our case worker at All God's Children.

So I ran to the computer lab (these were the days before internet in the portables) and checked it out. I read through the details of a little girl, showing amazing self restraint at not going directly to the photos at the end.

This little girl was only 7 months old! One of the youngest referrals seen at AGCI. She loved to be held, and her favorite activity was music time. How could she not be my child?

With tears in my eyes, and a heart screaming "YES! YES! YES!" I scrolled down and saw this beautiful face:

She had ten fingers, ten toes, and three chins!!!!

So glad you're in our family, Dayna!

O Tannenbaum

2011-11-29T17:46:00.001-08:00

When I was a kid, we used to go up the mountain to cut down our tree.

Life in Nebraska is a bit different. We head out some county roads and go to a tree farm out of Ashland. No (reasonably priced) Douglas Firs out here.

A white pine will have to do.

I don't think I could ever go with artificial. They just don't smell right.

I think this may be the first year she got to put the angel on top.
Dan let me break from tradition and do a tree entirely in red and white. Thanks, Dan!

Gretna Singing Christmas Tree

2011-11-29T17:37:00.001-08:00

The 2011 Singing Christmas Tree is in the books! Dayna did a great job, hanging in there quite well with the bigger kids!
Dan ran sound and lights, Alaina accompanied, and Dayna sang.

With my partners in crime: Holly Campbell, Kris Perry, and Carmen Campbell

A tree made of children's voices!

Family Tree of Thanksgiving 2011

2011-11-29T17:30:00.000-08:00

This year's Family Tree of Thanksgiving. Our priorities may not reflect in the right order, but we are learning to be thankful for everything.

Could She Be Any Cuter?

2011-11-29T17:25:00.001-08:00

I mean, really. The gaps in her teeth, the sporty denim jacket, the ladybug corduroy jumper...
...and pink and brown cowboy boots.
I don't they they come much cuter than this!

Orphan Sunday Pictures

2011-11-29T17:10:00.001-08:00

We had quite the children's choir...unpredictable...making a joyful noise! It was good to see so many families touched by adoption. Enjoy the pictures.

All I Ever Have to Be

2011-11-16T18:51:00.000-08:00

An old Amy Grant song is speaking to me tonight. What a great reminder that I am who God made me to be...and while I'm a work in progress, any attempts to be anyone other than who God made goes directly against His creation of what He considers to be a masterpiece.

When the weight of all my dreams
Is resting heavy on my head,
And the thoughtful words of health and hope
Have all been nicely said.

But I'm still hurting,
Wondering if I'll ever be
The one I think I am.

I think I am.

Then you gently re-remind me
That you've made me from the first,
And the more I try to be the best
The more I get the worst.

And I realize the good in me,
Is only there because of who you are.

Who you are...

And all I ever have to be
Is what you've made me.
Any more or less would be a step
Out of your plan.

As you daily recreate me,
Help me always keep in mind
That I only have to do
What I can find.

And all I ever have to be
All I have to be
All I ever have to be
Is what you've made me.

Bacon

2011-11-12T19:17:00.000-08:00

Today's blog is brought to you by our guest blogger, Dan.

Dayna had a minor procedure at Boystown Hospital on Monday that required her to be put under general anesthesia for about 30 minutes.

The anesthesiologist has the ability to make the gas smell like certain tasty scents. So when he entered the room, he asked her if she wanted grape, strawberry or bubblegum.

Dayna replied, "Do you have bacon?"

Being good with kids, the Doctor replied, "Not...anymore. We got rid of that when we
discontinued Macaroni and Cheese. We also got rid of tuna because no one ever requested it."

She settled for bubblegum.

Editor's note: The views expressed in this post are not necessarily endorsed or supported by Alaina. No pig has been killed or otherwise harmed in the posting of this blog entry.

Semper Fi 2011

2011-11-10T17:32:00.000-08:00

In honor of the Marine Corps birthday, Dayna had a song for her Papa today.

Orphan Sunday 2011

2011-11-06T11:39:00.000-08:00

Today was Orphan Sunday. This is the third year we've observed Orphan Sunday and the first year we've had a significant portion of the service set aside. Today, we had a family interviewed about their adoption experience, as well as a children's choir of kiddos from around the world (and their siblings, friends, cousins...) singing some poignant (well, that was the intention, anyway) songs about God's love for children.

So...the sound system was off, and the monitors gave screeching feedback, and sweet Levi belted out every fourth word into the microphone; another child kept falling across the stage in a perfect comedy act.

Don't know how well the message came off, but the children who were singing "I Am not Forgotten" won't be forgotten anytime soon!

Enjoy the video...a few of the faces from our church touched by adoption. The song is "One Less" by Matthew West.

Running on Empty

2011-11-04T15:34:00.001-07:00

Pretty much where I'm living these days.

Thoughts on Halloween

2011-10-31T19:43:00.000-07:00

Halloween seems to be an incredibly divisive issue among Christians. And it seems no matter what side of the issue people fall on, they can be outspokenly judgmental toward those on the other side.

Personally, we're not fans of Halloween. We don't carve pumpkins, we don't go to haunted houses, we don't do witches, ghosts, skeletons, zombies, etc. We do allow Dayna to have a costume; she hits a couple of houses for some free candy; and we allow her to participate in her class party.

But we also have lengthy discussions about things God specifically addresses (the evils of witchcraft, sorcery and the like) and those that God doesn't mention (is it okay to have a costume? What about trick-or-treating?)

Some Christians celebrate Halloween and use it as an outreach opportunity. What a wonderful conviction that God has given them. Other Christians avoid the holiday altogether. Again, if that is how they are convicted, that's the path they should follow.

I guess I think to the passage that everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial. And do the actions I choose cause another Christian to stumble? I think if you are firm in your convictions, whatever they are, then I shouldn't be a stumbling block to you. But...if your convictions aren't solid, or you've never thought about them...what do my actions say?

This forces some amount of intentionality as we share with Dayna what exactly we believe God wants us to do about Halloween. It was interesting tonight, as we didn't really offer her a choice. Bible Study is on Monday night, so that's where we were going. Only 2 children showed up tonight for her class. I asked her if she was glad she went.

Her answer was overwhelmingly in support of Bible Study (despite the low turnout) because, after all, "I got to learn more about Jesus."

Another Season Done

2011-10-30T18:32:00.000-07:00

Dan works part-time at the local pumpkin patch every fall. Six weeks of action-packed fun for him (he gets to drive the train now.) Six weeks of extra income for the holidays. Six weeks of fending on my own with Dayna at night.

Not that it's so bad...one of the perks is a family pass. Another perk is 25% off all of our food purchases. So when I'm too exhausted to entertain in the evenings, I let the pumpkin patch cook dinner and let Dayna jump on the giant inflatable pillows for an hour...or let her crawl in the giant corn box (like a sand box)...or simply walk all over the Patch and call it a workout. (Of course, the uber-delicious miniature chocolate chip cookies pretty much counteract the walking.)

It's a fun time, and we look forward to it every year. But now, pumpkin patch season is over. I have my husband back.

All is well in the world.

Going Bananas

2011-10-29T18:41:00.000-07:00

Dayna: Sometimes I drive you bananas.

Mom: Yes, but I will always love you bunches!

(Okay, you can groan now.)

More Thoughts on the High Road

2011-10-28T17:15:00.000-07:00

If you read my last post, I referred to a comment Dan recently made about me taking the high road (especially professionally, when others don't behave in a professional manner.)

I'm in the middle of 3 different battles right now at work. I'm being personally and professionally attacked from every side. And I continue to take the high road. It makes me think of my favorite poet, Robert Frost, and his well-loved poem "The Road Not Taken."

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

The high road is a lonely road. It's dark. Scary. Uncertain. It's full of potholes you can't see. It's bumpy and uneven.

But God told us to take the road not taken. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few. Matthew 7:14

I guess I can take courage in knowing that the high road is exactly where God wants me to be.

I was Googling to find the image for this post. I ran across this story:

During the Civil War, confederate General W. H. C. Whiting was jealous of rival general Robert E. Lee. Consequently Whiting spread many rumors about him. But there came a time when General Lee could have gotten even. When President Jefferson Davis was considering Whiting for a key promotion, he asked General Lee what he thought of Whiting. Without hesitation, Lee endorsed and commended Whiting. The officers who witnessed the exchange were astonished. Afterward, one of them asked Lee if he had forgotten all the unkind words that Whiting had spread about him.

“I understand the president wanted to know my opinion of Whiting,” responded Lee, “not Whiting’s opinion of me.”

It doesn't really matter what the people in my battles think of me. It matters what God thinks of me. And so I continue on the road not taken.

The Rules of the Game

2011-10-27T15:19:00.001-07:00

I have a difficult person in my life. For 7 years, I have ridden her roller coaster of friendliness, followed by passive aggression, followed by sarcasm, followed by friendliness. I never know when I might say something to set her off and start the whole cycle of the cold shoulder and behind my back bullying. This is not a person I can avoid. What stinks the most is that other people are watching and observing (including young people.)

The other day, Dan was commenting to someone else that what he really admires about me is that when I'm faced with a situation like this, I always take the high road.

You know...I'm getting tired of the high road. I'm getting tired of apologizing and making peace for things I haven't done wrong. I'm getting tired of playing a game with someone who keeps changing the rules at her own whim.

What do you do when the rules change?

The Days are a Blur

2011-10-25T18:08:00.000-07:00

In reverse order:

Today: 2 hour meeting after school
Monday: BSF
Friday-Sunday: Conference in Ohio
Wednesday-Thursday: Parent/Teacher conferences (as the teacher)
Tuesday: Parent/ Teacher conferences (as the parent)
Monday: BSF
Sunday: Nebraska City
Saturday: I think I was home.

Yes...it has been over ten days since I have been home other than sleeping.

And tomorrow: family night at church.

I'm ready for November...

To-Do List

2011-10-11T18:02:00.001-07:00

Dear God,

Please help me to accomplish what YOU want me to accomplish today. There are so many things to do, and I'm weary. Help me to find my priorities. I know YOU can multiply time, but should You choose not to, please help me to rest tonight knowing I did what I could do.

Amen.

Eeewwww

2011-10-05T19:11:00.000-07:00

We try really hard to not let Dayna dictate household policy, but I had to share her latest edict:

"For the next two weeks no more romanktic stuf! Yuck!!!!!! (No more plese!)"

I've got to admit...Dan and I were *whisper* alone tonight for 3 hours. And we were so busy about the business of life that we can't get accomplished with a 6-year-old around that we didn't even have a chance to think about "romanktic stuf."

I guess we'd better fix that. When our two weeks are up, that is...

Necessity

2011-10-04T16:57:00.000-07:00

Our Budding Author

2011-10-02T16:37:00.000-07:00

Dayna has been working at school on adding detail sentences to her writing. Here's her latest story (all spelling left intact):

The Dog and the Walk
by Dayna Wilson

One day Tom took his dog's leshe down. The dog was very egsiydid.
Next Tom put the leshe on the dog. The dog was still very egsiydid.
Finally Tom took him for a walk. The dog was very very egisidid.
The End

Overwhelmed

2011-09-30T19:27:00.001-07:00

Today was one of those days where my to-do list was so long, and the things on it were critical to be done today. I was overwhelmed and honestly had no idea how it would all get done.

So in my morning prayer, I asked God to help me accomplish only what He wanted me to do today. By 9:00 am, I had completed a huge chunk of what I was responsible to do. There's still a lot to be done, but without returned emails, my hands were tied. I had an incredible amount of peace about that.

It was a good day at school. (See previous post.) The pinnacle of the day was running into friends at the pumpkin patch. They had never been before, so Dayna and I had fun playing tour guides. Their son David even got to ride in the front of the train with Dan.

So, I didn't accomplish everything on the list, but I'm going to bed now with a content heart and memories of a day well lived. (I can even rest easy knowing I made it to 10 posts this month...with 2 1/2 hours to spare!)

Bubbles

2011-09-30T19:21:00.001-07:00

After a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day yesterday (really...8 out of 10 classes had really horrible behavior, and Mrs. Wilson turned into the Music Teacher from the Black Lagoon), I came home exhausted and grumpy.

Dayna suggested I tell my students the same story her teacher uses to get kids to stop talking. Would you know? It really worked! Those same 10 classes were *almost* angels today; at least, the talking was under control. I can't believe it's taken me 13 years to figure this out. And really, it may not even work next week...but today, I'm happy.

So...what is this secret trick? When I say the word "bubble", the students have to catch a bubble in their mouth. The bubble will pop if they talk, hum, or even open their mouths. Any student caught talking or making noise after I say "bubble" receives a check. (Do students even know what the checks mean? I wonder sometimes.)

Anyway, I think I only needed to say it more than once in about 3 classes. Even my extremely chatty (that's a charitable description) Kindergarten class did so well we were able to get out the instruments and play today.

Here's hoping it still works next week...

I Don't Even Know Where to Start...

2011-09-29T18:54:00.000-07:00

I saw this comment on a news story tonight. I'm torn somewhere between speechless and having way too much to say on the matter.

It is frustrating to me that so many conservatives hand over their kids to the state for “FREE” care & education. Our state-run education system is a monstrosity that is feeding our crumbling nation with a mass of poorly educated population that will willingly swallow all things anti-liberty. Rather than expecting the agenda-driven educators and administrators to be something that who and what they are, why not start a mass exodus out of the state-run education system. Imagine if every PROFESSING conservative put their actions where their rhetoric is and gave their children a real education (i.e. homeschool). We would have quite a generation to rise up to secure freedoms that previous generations so foolishly squandered. If you send your kids to the state school you will get a state education — think Nazi youth movement.

1. I'm not handing my kid over to the state for a "free" education. I am preparing her to be a light in the world.

2. Last I checked, neither myself, my colleagues, nor my daughter's teachers are agenda-driven or anti-liberty. Administration, maybe (in some cases)...but the vast majority of teachers in the public school system are simply trying to teach.

3. I believe myself, my colleagues and my daughter's teachers ARE providing a "real" education (to those students who are coming to school ready to learn.)

Honestly, I'm sick and tired of conservatives who are shooting the rest of us in the foot by spewing such ignorant, close-minded rhetoric.

Thoughts on Heaven

2011-09-29T18:51:00.000-07:00

Dayna's favorite pastime is "tickle wrestling" with her dad. Not just tickling or wrestling, but tickle wrestling.

We were talking tonight about heaven and giving Jesus our crowns. Somehow, the conversation turned to the fact that we will actually be able to touch Jesus in heaven, and not just think of Him or look at Him.

"Can I tickle wrestle with Jesus?" I'm pretty sure that will be in the cards.

"Will he tickle wrestle like Daddy?" Probably even better, because He'll know all the best tickle spots.

"Like my knees and my toes and even my armpits?"

Yes, Dayna. Even your armpits.

Spa Day

2011-09-24T11:33:00.000-07:00

I came home from my meeting this morning to be greeted by a little girl who wanted to serve me. She found my inflatable foot bath and had her daddy help fill it with warm soapy water. She found a pillow and put it in a chair, brought me a book and a can of pop, and encouraged me to just sit and enjoy. She massaged my feet, painted my nails, applied many, many, many layers of top coat, and (not-so)-gently blew on my little piggies to help them dry.

Then she brought out my makeup. She took a warm cloth and (not-so)-gently removed my existing makeup, then applied many, many, many layers of foundation, blush, eye shadow, mascara, lipstick, lip gloss, and so on.

Next, she (not-so)-gently brushed my hair and placed many, many, many hair clips and rubber bands in it.

(You know...it's really too bad that we're having computer issues and I can't post a picture.)

Finally, she placed a pillow on the floor and gave me a massage. She applied many, many, many layers of baby lotion (to moisturize) and baby powder (to keep me dry), followed by several sprays from a water bottle (to moisturize) and pumps from an air pump (to keep me dry) {can you say brrrr......?}

Despite my strange looking toes, somewhat decent makeup, unusual hair and goosebumps all over my back, I've got to say...I kind of enjoy having a spa day.

Survey Says...

2011-09-21T15:33:00.000-07:00

This is a little bit of a pet peeve post...be warned!

I'm looking at a receipt I recently got from an office supply store. At the bottom, it says "If you were happy with your service please take the survey and give us 5's."

I've got a problem when people tell you how to fill out a survey. You know...sometimes I "agree"; I don't have to always "strongly agree."

Last year, Dan & I bought a new (to us) vehicle. The salesman was wonderful. Former Marine. Family guy. Honest. A straight shooter. We really enjoyed working with him. As soon as the sale was final, he turned to Dan and told him that a survey would come in the mail. We should fill out "strongly agree" for everything. Dan & I talked about it, and felt that we needed to fill it out honestly, and not necessarily the way we were told. Frankly, although we were quite happy with our purchase and the salesman, we just didn't "strongly agree" on everything.

A few weeks later, the salesman called Dan quite upset. He wanted to know what he had done wrong that we would not give him a "strongly agree" in every category. Dan said that we were quite happy, and had no complaints. The salesman went on to tell Dan that he missed out on a large bonus because we didn't fill out the survey the way we were told.

Wait a second...I don't believe the salesman was justified in blaming us and the survey for not getting the bonus. We didn't have any complaints...we just weren't gushing over every detail of our used car purchase.

This survey situation left a bad taste in our mouth for this dealership. When did we start dictating how people should feel about their shopping experiences? A survey should be optional and people should be able to fill it out as they see fit. Maybe that's just old-fashioned of me, though...

Chocolate

2011-09-20T17:20:00.000-07:00

Today was one of those days...

Kindergarten going wild while trying to give a test.

Second grade out of control talking...after 5 different "do-overs" for the class, I finally put myself in time-out before the volcano known as Mount Wilson erupted...for 15 minutes!!!!

Another second grade class that literally took 6 minutes to figure out that I was waiting for them to be quiet...and 4 sweet children sat quietly looking at me with their beautiful brown eyes waiting as well (I hear they got to eat lunch with their teacher as a reward).

That's how it all started today.

Forget the Calgon...I'm headed straight for the chocolate!

Just Because You Can...

2011-09-18T18:08:00.001-07:00

...doesn't mean you should.

A few weeks ago, we went camping at our favorite local campground. We are usually the only people there (maybe 3 or 4 other sites taken in the entire campground), but this time, at least 2/3 of the campground was full. It's on a quiet lake...no motors allowed. The facilities are primitive (pit toilets). It's really a peaceful, lazy spot to get away for a little bit.

Until our recent trip. One of the campers near us kept his generator running well past midnight. Then, bright and early (around 6am), he started it up again. So, I'm awake long before I planned, and stumbled bleary-eyed to the nearest hole in the ground. On the way, the "gentleman" with the generator let his little yapper dog chase me down and start licking and sniffing me. I raised an eyebrow and mentioned that it was pretty early. He seemed oblivious, so I asked if the generator was necessary at that hour. He looked at his watch and said "It's legal." He went on to tell me that in a campground with no hookups, you can run a generator 24/7 if you want. He even dared me to call the Sheriff and ask. I did call the Sheriff's office to confirm this. I was told that Nebraska campgrounds had no quiet hours, and that people go camping to party all night long.

Despite the assertions of this horribly arrogant man and the local sheriff's office, I discovered that Nebraska campgrounds do indeed have quiet hours, and they extend to generators, regardless of the availability of electricity in the campground.

So, once I got past the grumpiness of the early morning wake-up call, I realized that this was the perfect teachable moment for Dayna (who slept until 9:30, by the way) that just because you CAN do something, doesn't mean you SHOULD.

What many people consider to be their rights are really responsibilities. We had a lovely time around our breakfast table brainstorming things that may be allowed but aren't necessary.

Where Were You?

2011-09-11T16:36:00.000-07:00

Ten years ago this morning, I was driving to school when I heard the news that an airliner had flown into one of the World Trade Center buildings. There didn't seem to be a huge urgency from what I heard on the radio. Just a lot of confusion about what could have possibly happened to create an "accident" like that. I arrived at school, parked my car, and walked into the building. In the short time it took me to walk from the parking lot to the school, a second plane hit the other tower. At this moment, the horrible feeling filled my soul that this wasn't an "accident." This was a cold, calculated attack on our nation...unlike anything I had ever witnessed.

The next hour was surreal as the staff sat speechless in the library watching the horrors unfold. I remember calling Dan at work and telling him he really needed to find a television and see what was happening...it took several phone calls to convince him that this wasn't just "an interesting news story."

We were instructed to continue through the day as though nothing had happened. We were not to discuss it with the students, and to continue "business as usual." Fortunately, this was in the days before we all had ready access to the internet in our classrooms. The Kindergarten classes had gone on a field trip that day, leaving me with an hour in the middle of the morning. I sat in the teacher's lounge and watched as the towers fell. I heard of the two subsequent planes that went down...one at the Pentagon and another in a field in Pennsylvania.

After school, I drove home, only to hear that the President was in Omaha. I feared for our city, not knowing if Omaha would be a target with the AFB and Strategic Command nearby. I was so focused on getting back to my apartment, I didn't think to fill the gas tank...just in case.

Once home, I was confused why Dan didn't come home. He had a rehearsal that evening, and decided to go. This was before we both had cell phones and I had no way to reach him. I continued to get more and more worried. I needed to have someone to help me process what had happened that day. By the time Dan finally came home, I was very upset. I don't recall how everything got resolved...that entire evening is now a blur. But I do remember playing (over and over and over) the Twila Paris song "God is in Control."

It's amazing how much has changed, and how that day changed my life forever. I'm not convinced that all of the changes have been good. But I do know that September 11, 2011 did not come as a surprise to God. I do not believe that God caused this to happen, but I do take comfort in knowing that He is still in control, and that He is bigger than al Qaeda, bigger than terrorists, bigger than evil, and bigger than the Evil One who would dare to orchestrate such horrific events.

Questioning and Teachability

2011-09-05T12:49:00.000-07:00

Pastor Mark finished his summer series on the Minor Prophets yesterday with a sermon on Malachi. It's funny how America in 2011 isn't all that different from Israel after the exile.

One of the statements he made in the sermon that keeps sticking with me is how Israel (America?) was a nation that questioned and argued everything and had lost their teachable spirit. Wow. I'm a questioner...I want to know why I'm supposed to do something.

But the more I think about it, the more I see that while questioning is not a bad thing (How did you come up with that conclusion? What is the rationale behind this decision?), Americans have refined the art of questioning for the purpose of challenge and argument. I can't even read the comments on news stories anymore, because people have become so nasty. You may think it takes courage and boldness to "say what you think" in an online forum...but really, it's cowardice to sit behind the anonymity of a computer monitor and spout hatred.

This whole concept of questioning for the sake of confrontation and losing a spirit of teachability was illustrated in my classroom on Friday. We have just spent 3 weeks digging deeply into the Star-Spangled Banner...learning history, vocabulary, singing tips, and the value of defending your opinion (e.g. you can say the song is stupid, but I want to know why...) After dealing with 2 weeks' worth of outbursts from a particular student, he managed once again to get the last word and spout off in a disruptive and disrespectful tone. When I spoke to him privately, he didn't seem to see a problem with the way he spoke to me. (I have also been warned that this attitude comes from his parents as well.) I see a classic example of someone who feels he has the right (when it's really a privilege) to free speech and interrupting the instruction of his classmates so he can question, challenge and argue with a teacher. In the process, it is clear that this student does not have a teachable spirit.

As a questioner myself, I ask: do I question to be informed or to start an argument? What is the heart and spirit behind the questions I ask?

What about you?

Impressions

2011-08-31T17:47:00.000-07:00

This evening, I learned of a conversation that occurred yesterday between two other music teachers about me. Ordinarily, this would completely pique my curiosity, and leave me completely obsessing over what others think of me. Instead, I'm kind of speechless. A happy kind of speechless.

One teacher asked the other how well she knew me, because it seemed to her that all I ever talk about is "God, God, God" and "praying, praying, praying." (These impressions have been taken from my Facebook posts.) The second teacher thought that was actually kind of cool, but that I did talk about other things as well.

I find this interesting, as I'm not consciously using Facebook as an avenue for witnessing, but like any interactions I have, I pray about the right words and opportunities.

So if the impression that I make is that I love Jesus, I pray that I reflect Him well.

Strangers and Aliens

2011-08-30T18:34:00.000-07:00

This is one of those posts that could stir up a whole hornet's nest. I don't have answers...but I have a gnawing in my gut that won't go away...so here is my train of thought. Follow at your own risk.

Throughout Scripture, we are commanded to care for the orphan and widow. Okay...I've got that one. I have a passion and heart for orphans, and I definitely see the need to care for widows, single moms...I think our church is starting to really reach out to these groups.

But Scripture is also clear to care for the alien, or stranger. Ruth was a Moabitess who came with Naomi back to Bethlehem. She was an outsider. Yet Boaz, an influential man, took her in, married her, and together they had a family that included Christ Himself many generations later.

Many conservative Christians today are downright angry about the immigration situation in our country. And I get it. I really do. I am conservative myself to the core. It's easy to spout opinions about immigration, legal and illegal. And the "America First" mentality is also easy to understand. We're proud of our country, after all. And we work hard to provide for our families. And we obey the laws of the land...

You know, when we went through Immigration for our adoption of Dayna, we saw a beautiful young Mexican bride trying to go through the correct channels to become an American citizen. The poor girl was confused and didn't have a marriage certificate to show her new name. The Immigration officer was screaming at her and berating her; a little compassion would have cleared up the confusion, and the young girl could have returned with the necessary document. Instead, this poor frightened girl was trying to do the right thing and being horribly mistreated by an agent of the country she was trying to enter.

So I get that the Bible says to take care of strangers and aliens, and I get that the Bible says to obey the laws of the land. So logically, that means take care of the strangers who come here through the correct channels.

But life isn't always logical. I think back to WWII when thousands of Jewish people were trying to escape Nazi Germany, but no country would take them in...all the immigration quotas were filled. When the letter of the law was followed, people died.

I think of some of the dear students I teach who have come straight from refugee camps. Children whose families have come to America to escape horrendous situations, or who come here to try to climb out of the pit of poverty. I look into these faces and teach them because I love them. I don't ask if their families are here legally or not. It doesn't matter to me why they are here...I just know that for whatever reason, God has allowed them to be in one of my classes for a brief moment in time, and I need to love them in His name.

I don't know that it's my place to ask why people are coming to America. Yes...a great many are looking for a handout. But...aren't there a lot of Americans who are using the system as well? On the other hand, how many are coming here just trying to survive?

There are no easy answers to the immigration dilemma. But I also think that there needs to be more compassion...after all, what would Jesus do?

Alone Time

2011-08-30T15:30:00.000-07:00

It seems now that school is in and our schedules have changed that alone time is getting harder to come by. Dan's home in the mornings now, logging in a few hours before he takes Dayna to school and goes into the office. This means I can't work out alone...I've been getting some early morning walks, but no energy or drive to try to run. When I get home, it's snuggle and read with Dayna, then dinner (which Dan usually has under control...right now, I can smell barbecue beef!), bedtime for Dayna, a little TV, and bedtime for us.

I do manage about 20-30 minutes every morning to spend in Bible Study and devotion. But beyond that, I kind of feel like I'm in "go, go, go" mode.

Anybody else find it difficult to make down time ("alone" time, "me" time...whatever you want to call it) work when life gets so busy?

I know, I know...this is a season. And it's not a bad season. I just wonder if there are other ways I can find to recharge.

Crock Pot Girls

2011-08-29T17:51:00.001-07:00

I discovered my new favorite web site of the day:

www.crockpotgirls.com

They set up their Facebook page on the 19th of August. Within ten days, they have 219 thousand followers (and counting...probably 220k by the time I publish this post.)

If you're looking for a great site to save time, check out Crock Pot Girls (or find them on Facebook.)

Update: 24 hours later, they have 565 thousand fans...over a half million in 11 days!!! Why didn't I think of this?

Off and Running

2011-08-28T16:02:00.001-07:00

I've got to say...this year has been a much easier transition to teaching than last year. Maybe I'm finally accepting that full-time is my lot for this season of my life. I find myself a bit calmer (okay, a lot calmer) in the classroom. My tone is not as harsh, but still firm. In fact...the only discipline issues I've had so far have really only been with kiddos that are new to my classes. The students who know me have responded very well to the procedures and lessons.

Even our home life is more relaxed. Schoolwork stays at school, and I'm home and emotionally available to my family in the evenings. Things are really on an even keel. The house may not be as clean, and the meals are sometimes grab and go, but really...the stress level in our home at the beginning of this school year has really been manageable.

I pray it stays this way.

BSF Theme Verse

2011-08-27T18:56:00.000-07:00

We had our first leader's meeting this morning. I came across this passage in 1 Thessalonians, chapter 2, verse 8. It just really jumped out at me and has become my theme verse for my group of ladies this year:

We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us.

I pray that not only will the gospel and God's truth be shared this year, but that our lives would become woven together as relationships build and become dear to us.

Oh...and Dear Jesus...

2011-08-24T18:42:00.001-07:00

...could you help my Mom and Dad not to kiss so much?

I'm a Mean Lady

2011-08-24T16:50:00.000-07:00

Yup...those words were muttered angrily at me by an indignant six-year-old boy who didn't like the fact that he wasn't supposed to touch things in the classroom that didn't belong to him. It seems that this youngster (like many other new kiddos in my life this year) has never been told "no" before. So as he stomped his little feet and yelled at me that he was going to tell his mom on me, I stifled my giggles and used my serious voice to tell him that I would love to talk to his mom.

Poor kid...I really can't blame his frustration. But rules are rules, and I'm just not the warm, fuzzy teacher type. So I held my ground.

The funny thing is, the next day, we were playing a silly little game and he was giggling and smiling and having a grand time. I asked him at the end of class if I was still mean. His response: "No...you're pretty cool."

That's kind of how life works in Mrs. Wilson's classroom. If you follow the rules, we have a great time; if you don't...

...well, don't make me use my "mean" voice.

*I do find it incredibly interesting that the only "issues" I've had so far this year involve students who don't already know me. So I'll take heart, continue to be firm, and remember that I'm there to help shape future adults...not to make friends.*

Family Game Night

2011-08-14T15:39:00.001-07:00

When Papa and Nana came to visit, we decided it was time to teach Dayna how to play Tumbling Towers.
Let me show you how it's done:

Nana's not so sure about his technique.

Nana doesn't seem to have a lot of confidence in Dan.Papa looked almost bored.

Maybe it's easier with only 9 fingers...

The higher the pressure, the tighter the lips.

How can the tower stand up to such pressure?

The deft Dayna demonstrates her dexterity.

It took some intense concentration.

Dan even attempted the Jedi mind trick.
But alas...
...the walls did come tumbling down.
And who was the culprit?
Guilty as charged.

God Laughs

2011-08-02T12:28:00.001-07:00

Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. 1 Peter 3:15

I had an appointment this morning, but not the kind of appointment I was expecting. Yes...it was time for my annual exam. You know...the "I'd rather be having a root canal without anesthetic than be here" appointment.

So while I'm sitting there in all my glory, falling out of that skimpy little gown, the conversation turns to a former student (daughter of one of her colleagues). We both attended her graduation party in May. For her guest book, she had a wide-margin Bible where guests could highlight a special verse and write a message. We discussed what a great idea this was. The conversation quickly turned to the book of Isaiah and how hungry my doctor was to dig into the Word.

She shared that she recently turned a corner in her faith and wanted to go deeper into God's Word. Mind you...I'm sitting here mostly undressed in a vulnerable position when she asks if I've ever heard of this Bible study that's "three letters" and "takes seven or eight years." It was in this precarious position that I shared about Bible Study Fellowship and invited her to the intro class in September.

I must say...it's the most unusual place I've ever had a deep spiritual conversation.

I can still hear God snickering as I remember the verse to "always be prepared."

Saunders County Fair

2011-07-31T19:39:00.001-07:00

This was Dayna's first year in 4-H as a Clover Kid. She entered the maximum 5 projects, and really enjoyed the "family and citizenship" focus.
Her peanut butter pine cone bird feeder.

"See What I Can Do" - Chinese calligraphy numbers.

Scrapbook page from the day she came home from China. Her journaling: "I'm glad I came home from China to be with my American family."
A family celebration poster: Chinese New Year.
Her tie-dyed T-shirt. Oh, am I happy they make these nifty little spray bottles for projects like this!

Knowing Better, Part 2

2011-07-31T14:07:00.000-07:00

While the first day of the conference was convicting, the second day was more uplifting. It was...well...even better.

We learned that better is better

When better is the Blood.

Beth contrasted two mountains in the Bible: Mount Sinai, where sacrifices were continually offered and man lived under judgment; and Mount Zion, where Jesus mediates a new covenant in His blood.

When better is a Savior.

Knowing better is not about having better behavior, it's about knowing Christ.

When better is God's love.

We can't love God until we accept that He loves us. We can't be in His will if we aren't abiding in His love.

When better is a way.

I don't have a lot written here, but we can choose to love again, even when our hearts have been broken. We need to look to Christ...He is the Way.

When better is a country.

God has prepared a city (Zion) for us. Even now, we are longing for this better country.

God has planned something BETTER for us....will we choose to keep moving forward, or living in our past, where the better makes us bitter?

Disclaimer: many, many Scripture references were given in the course of the weekend. I'm happy to share if you ask...just didn't included them all in these posts.

Knowing Better, Part 1

2011-07-31T13:53:00.000-07:00

Last month, I had the opportunity to take a friend to the Beth Moore conference in Lincoln. I've never done a Beth Moore study, so I didn't really know what I was getting in to. The time spent getting to know my friend better was priceless. The worship was amazing. And the message was timely on so many levels.

Beth did a word study of the word "better." She had done a poll via Twitter about the connotation the word "better" had for people. I scratched my head and thought, "how can better be a bad thing." Then she shared ideas like "you can do better" or "I'd be better off...."

So she started with the thought that there is a better that is bitter, and there is a better that is better.

This post will focus on when better is bitter.

Better is bitter

When better is before. That is, when you are caught in the past and can't take a step forward.

This one gave me cause to ponder. How many times do I compare my current circumstances to life before I moved here? It's not that Nebraska is so horrible. It really isn't. But it's also not Oregon. However, is the Oregon in my memory the Oregon that would be reality for me if I lived there? Probably not.

When better is someone besides me.

Ouch. How often do I play the comparison game? I'm so competitive, and it's hard for me to let go and let someone be better than me. Do I think of others as better in a prideful (bitter) or humble (better) way? Someone being better doesn't make me worse, it makes me second. That's an interesting way to think about it.

When better is the route I didn't take.

How many regrets do I have that are eating me up? Beth shared that the word "better" is used most by Solomon. He said it 21 times in the book of Proverbs (better is ____ than _____). This was when his life was working out pretty well. He also used it 23 times in the much shorter book of Ecclesiastes. This was written after a time of chastisement from the Lord, and he was very depressed. (I would have been better off dead...)

When better is what you should have known.

Yeah...I kick myself all the time for stupid things I say and do, knowing "better." There's a difference between when you should have known better (foolishness) and when you did know better and did it anyway (failure).

So...little did I realize just how bitter I could be when God had something much better in store for me.

Stir-Up Days or Bust

2011-07-30T09:45:00.000-07:00

Dayna participated in the Kiddie Parade for Ashland Stir-Up Days last weekend.

First we cleaned the wagon.

Then we bent some wire.
You can do it, Dan!
Duct tape works on everything.
Front of the wagon.
Back of the wagon.

There she goes...Stir-Up Days or Bust.

(For the record...she tied for 3rd place AND got her picture in the paper.)

A Visit from Papa and Nana

2011-07-30T09:40:00.000-07:00

We just had a fun week-long visit with my parents. We went to the zoo, enjoyed the Stir-Up Days parade, went bowling, shopping, played way too many games of Uno and just had fun.

All wet after the parade.

Control

2011-07-26T02:46:00.000-07:00

For those of you who know me, this probably isn't a huge surprise. I like to be in control. I hate conflict. If I can resolve a conflict, I will. It will cause me no small amount of anxiety, but I will try to find a solution. I will lose sleep (not necessarily by choice, but when you're an insomniac, it happens) until it is resolved.

Earlier this summer, I got some news. The news stinks. It's not good for myself or the other music teacher. Ultimately, it's not good for students. The two of us involved tried every which way to resolve the situation. We spent hours coming up with a solution...and it was a pretty good one, too. But the solution was rejected. Flat out ignored. We're reeling, losing sleep, getting angry and feeling betrayed. Numerous emails have been sent, they are read and left unacknowledged. We have tried to arrange a meeting, to no avail.

So our summer continues with no resolution, and the school year is about to start. We're already stressed, and the passive-aggressive nature of the person involved who has the authority in this situation is driving us crazy.

Please pray for me that God will work what I can't...and if He chooses not to, that He will give me the strength, stamina and creativity to proceed (with a good attitude).

Micah 6:8

2011-07-24T19:07:00.000-07:00

Wow! What a great message today. We're studying the Minor Prophets this summer at church. Today we were talking about Micah. I remember singing a worship chorus to Micah 6:8 when I was in high school...but I've never really thought about it before.

He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

You know, most days, I think I've got the "act justly" part down. I mean, I try to do the right thing. I become "righteously indignant" over the wrong thing. But that "love mercy" part...I'm not a merciful person. I'm a judgmental person. You know...the kind who wants to exact justice. And "walking humbly with God"...there's just so much there that I haven't got figured out.

Case in point, I'm becoming increasingly irritated and distracted by certain behaviors at church: kids playing with their DS during the service, adults playing solitaire or checking email and Facebook on their smart phones. Let me tell you, I get so chapped sometimes I have a hard time following the service. And I still believe these behaviors are absolutely out of line.

Well, when Lucas was speaking today, a cell phone started ringing during the service. It just kept going and going. Annoying as can be. Lucas got distracted while speaking, then finally left the platform, confiscated the phone from a junior high student, and smashed it with a hammer on the stage. Did he act justly...you bet! But did he love mercy? Absolutely not. Point made. Painfully...because it's the very issue of phones and gadgets at church that is getting under my skin.

And you know what? That's between them and God. Is it really any of my concern?

So I started thinking about my upcoming school year...already fraught with stress. I think of the unreasonable person I was last year. I was all about "acting justly" with my students, and even coworkers. But I didn't "love mercy." So, here is my new logo:
I plan to post it where it will be easily visible to remind me that my duty doesn't stop with my version of justice.

Orphan Sunday is Coming

2011-07-22T17:48:00.000-07:00

Orphan Sunday from DTJ on Vimeo.

What are you going to do?

Happy Birthday, America

2011-07-04T07:43:00.000-07:00

Some challenging thoughts from the sermon yesterday at church. Thanks, Pastor Mark.

Government has been ordained by God to preserve order, protect citizens and promote righteousness.

God doesn't endorse any particular form of government (i.e. monarchy, democracy, etc.), but he does ordain government. He does not necessarily endorse every person in authority, but he allows them, for that season and His ultimate purpose, to hold that position.

Christians are to cooperate with their government whenever possible, challenge their government whenever necessary and pray for their government at all times.

This one was my "ouch" moment, and I think may be for you as well. Do we spend more time ridiculing and criticizing our leaders, or praying for them? This is sin.

1 Peter 2:13-17 was written when Nero ruled Rome...probably the most evil leader the world has ever seen.

¹³ Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human authority: whether to the emperor, as the supreme authority, ¹⁴ or to governors, who are sent by him to punish those who do wrong and to commend those who do right. ¹⁵ For it is God’s will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish people. ¹⁶ Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil; live as God’s slaves. ¹⁷ Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor.

In 1 Timothy 2:1-2, the first thing Timothy was told to do was pray for authority.

¹ I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people— ² for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness.

God is King over all the earth and no respecter of nations.

America is not more loved or favored by God than other nations. We are indeed a great nation, but God shows us no greater favor than England or Zambia or Malaysia. I think of this a lot as I desire Dayna to be proud to be American AND Chinese. I would never want her to believe that we brought her here because we're better than her family and country of origin.

Our ultimate allegiance is to Christ, and our highest calling is to bring the good news of the gospel to bear on the whole world.

Our citizenship is in heaven. Period.

So today I will celebrate being American. I will remember to pray for our leaders. And I will exalt our Great High King.

Dozen

2011-07-02T10:58:00.000-07:00

A dozen eggs.

A dozen cookies.

A dozen cupcakes.

The Dirty Dozen.

A dime a dozen.

Baker's dozen.

Nineteen to the dozen.

Happy 12th anniversary, Dan! It's been a delightful dozen years.

Both Hands

2011-06-30T18:40:00.000-07:00

Our friends Guy and Christine Pinkman are preparing to meet their 6th child (3rd from China) sometime this summer. Ameilia (Meia) is 11 years old and has been writing the sweetest letters to her new family. They recently participated in the "Both Hands" project to 1.) help a widow in need, and 2.) raise some of the funds needed to complete their adoption.

Please take a moment to look at the video of their workday last weekend. If you feel led, please consider contributing to their fundraising attempts, or at least commit to praying for them as they complete this adoption.

Click for video.

Thanks!

Why Do I Care So Much?

2011-06-30T15:48:00.000-07:00

I've been invited by a friend at church to participate in Shaunti Feldhahn's study of the "Life Ready Woman" this summer. It's been a lot of fun getting to know some new ladies from church, and generally fellowship with other women in a way that I can't during the school year.

This study is refreshing, because it speaks to women wherever they are in their lives: stay-at-home moms, homeschooling, working outside the home, single, childless, widowed, divorced...you name it. Sometimes I feel like there are a lot of black holes in an Evangelical church setting for women who don't fit a typical mold.

The very first night of the group, I felt so empowered as a full-time working mom that I am EXACTLY where God wants me to be, even though I may not want to be there myself. We got to talking about expectations...what the world expects of us, what the church expects of us, even what our families expect of us. When we don't meet those expectations, there can be a lot of grief, anxiety and loneliness.

My friend Julie shared one of those simple, yet profound statements that I have really been digesting lately: "We have conversations with other people in our minds that never actually happened."

Do you do that? I know I do...I get myself so worked up about an encounter with someone I *think* is disappointed in me, or I *think* may disagree and therefore encounter conflict. I hate conflict. But...I wonder how many of my struggles with others come from this whole area of expectation, or even imaginary conversations.

And even if a certain person really is ticked at me, or disappointed, or angry and spreading rumors. Why do I care so much? Why are their opinions more important that God's?

Contentment

2011-06-30T12:38:00.000-07:00

This is one of those rare, God-given seasons where I find myself genuinely at peace, happy, and contented with where I am. I know that a storm may be brewing around the corner, and God may be shoring up my reserves right during this season. But for now, I'm enjoying this season...my family...my home...my lot.

*insert contented sigh*

Kids Bowl Free

2011-06-30T11:44:00.000-07:00

My friend Kari is the queen of finding things to do in the summer. She introduced me to Kids Bowl Free this summer. It's not too late if you're interested. In a nutshell, Dayna gets 2 free games EVERY DAY this summer. All we pay is her shoe rental (about $2.00 each time.) Dan and I decided to add the family pass for about $25, which gives us 2 free games per day, including our shoe rental. We were also able to add my parents to the family pass. The first time we went as a family, we would have spent $23 just for Dan and I. This has been a great way to use those hot summer days and spend some time together with friends and family. Enjoy the pictures of Dayna with her buddy Eli.

Hero Training Camp

2011-06-30T11:27:00.000-07:00

This summer at church, we're doing a new kind of VBS. It's called "Hero Training Camp." On Sunday mornings, while the kiddos are learning how to be superheroes for God, the parents are learning how to raise superheroes.

Since we've started this program, I've noticed Dayna is much more eager to lend a hand and help out without being asked. For example, a few weeks ago, we were having a tough morning getting started (okay...I was having a tough morning getting started) and there was a lot of nagging going on about getting Dayna's bed made. After the umpteenth time, I went upstairs to check on her, only to notice that she had made my bed as well. When she is asked to do something, it is the rule, not the exception that she does so with a cheerful attitude. On the rare occasion (now) that she doesn't respond cheerfully, she catches herself and fixes the attitude on her own.

It's been wonderful watching Dayna desire and learn to be a hero. She's learning how to praise God through her work and bless others. I've seen her be less selfish and more thoughtful.

I don't know that I've become much more of a superhero's mom, but I'm sure hoping that these positive changes will begin to impact my parenting as well.

Blue Like Jazz - My Take, Part 2

2011-06-29T17:07:00.000-07:00

Another issue with society in general and this book in particular, was the attitude toward people who don't agree with the author. I see it on Facebook, on other internet forums, in online news commentaries...it seems to be everywhere: the attitude of superiority and sometimes downright hatefulness to those who disagree. And while I see it on both sides of politics, it seems that the left side seems to paint the right with a broader brush than the other way around. It is for this reason that I really try to leave my politics off of Facebook; I would rather focus on what my friends and I have in common than to become divisive. Having said that, I sometimes wonder if some of my friends would still be my friends if they knew how I really felt about some of the issues on the table. We live in an age where agreeing to disagree agreeably seems to be a thing of the past.

Having said that, here are some quotes that I felt were divisive and close-minded toward others who take a different view than the author:

p. 132 I felt like, by going to this particular church, (although he really paints all Evangelical churches in this light throughout the book) I was a pawn for the Republicans. Meanwhile, the Republicans did not give a crap about the causes of Christ.

p. 188 There's not a lot of work in the Christian market if you won't write self-righteous, conservative propaganda.
(I have read many, many, many books through the years from the "Christian market"...and if they were full of self-righteous, conservative propaganda, they would have been promptly returned to the store. I don't read for propaganda...I read to consider new things and hopefully become a better person from the experience.)

The book was laced with other remarks that were less than open to the opinions or beliefs of those who consider themselves conservative, Republican, or Evangelical. And when the attitude pervades that "I'm right, and they're wrong", and yet I find great irony and hypocrisy when the author repeatedly calls those who disagree with him "self-righteous."

Now, do I think Conservatives have all the answers? No. Do I think Liberals have it all together? Absolutely not. There is only One person who has the answers and who will never let us down. I choose to let Him reveal Himself to me through His Word, while the author of this book draws his conclusions about God from his own fickle experiences.

p. 226 My friend Julie from Seattle says the key to everything rests in the ability to receive love, and what she says is right because my personal experience tells me so.

Despite the theology that just didn't match Scripture, I had a hard time reading the book. While some love the "honest", "fresh", "transparent" tone of his writing, I found it self-indulgent and short-sighted. It really read more like the rambling journal of one adolescent male trying to apply universal truths to his own personal experiences. And much of his writing smacked of self-pride (i.e. p. 213 "She had probably never met anyone fascinating like me before.") and condescension (i.e. p. 211 "They were cute, these little Christian people.")

One last episode that just left me scratching my head: on page 208, Miller recounts a time in his life when he was living "in the wild" and befriended some hippie friends (his term) who were working at a resort. He thought it was cool that these friends were like Robin Hood...stealing food from the rich resort owners and giving it to the poor (himself.) Did he not catch that by eating the stolen food that he was stealing himself? He was hardly starving and destitute...and I got the impression that this was an ongoing thing...not a one-time meal.

I have a lot more underlined and written in the book, but these are the main thoughts that have stuck with me since finishing the book a few weeks ago.

Anyway...these are some of my thoughts. Take them or leave them. I do appreciate that Miller was able to make me rethink what I believe about church and Christianity. I believe my own convictions are stronger, and I hope I have become a little more like the woman Christ wants me to be as a result of wrestling with some of these things. We are all, after all, a work in progress. At the end of the day, though, I want to know that my worldview and beliefs about God and Christianity come from the Bible and not exclusively from personal experience. I want to know that I serve and worship a God who created me in His image, and not a god I have created in mine.

If you've read this far, thanks for indulging me. I don't often write book reviews, but I felt I really needed to express my thoughts on this one.

And if you disagree...I hope we can disagree agreeably!

Blue Like Jazz - My Take, Part 1

2011-06-29T07:33:00.001-07:00

The book "Blue Like Jazz" was recommended to me many years ago by a friend, then later by a former pastor. Dan was quite interested in the book, and I saw it on the dollar table at a bookstore several years ago and picked it up. There it sat for a few years until recently...

I've been fascinated about the whole emerging/emergent/postmodern church movement lately and why some things about it concern me. A lot of this came after reading "The Shack" (which is a lengthy review for another time that I may or may not get around to doing.) I've been concerned about some trends in the church recently where, in a nutshell, people are picking and choosing what they want to believe about God, and in essence, creating God in their own image.

Now...I am human, I am imperfect, and my opinions can be wrong. My intention is in no way to slander or attack Donald Miller (a man I do not know), but rather to share some concerns and hopefully back them with Scripture.

So, that brings me back to "Blue Like Jazz"...I get where the author is trying to go, but I'm just not so sure about how he gets there or the conclusions he makes along the way. The subtitle of the book is "Nonreligious Thoughts on Christian Spirituality." Okay, okay...I get that if we are going to reach the world, we need to be able to relate to the way others view God, Christianity, etc. However, while society and culture are always changing, GOD NEVER WILL (Malachi 3:6, among others). Having said that, I have huge red flags waving at me when someone writes a book about Christianity and never quotes (as far as I recall) from the words of the living, unchanging God (that is, the Bible.)

So...here are some notes I wrote along the way and my thoughts (which I pray align with Scripture).

p. 5 "I started to sin about the time I turned ten."

Okay...I have a six-year-old; I was once a child myself. Maybe he became aware of his sin when he turned ten, but we are ALL sinners (Romans 3:23); every one alive has a sin nature with the exception of Christ (1 Peter 2:22.) I think a volume on Christianity should have a Biblical view of sin.

p. 51 "The goofy thing about Christian faith is that you believe it and don't believe it at the same time. It isn't unlike having an imaginary friend."

That's the thing about faith...the more I read and hear from others, the more I realize that those who don't know Christ very much view Him as imaginary; and to those who do know Him and have a vibrant relationship with Him, He is very, very real. For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 1 Corinthians 1:18. It frightens me that a man writing a book about Christianity would compare Jesus to an imaginary friend. Maybe this wasn't the point Miller was trying to make, but a statement like that at the beginning of the chapter was very difficult to get past as I continued reading.

Another concern I have from the book is the flippancy that Miller seems to give to things of God. Something that I see as having changed for the worse in recent years is a very casual attitude toward approaching God. Yes, He is here with us (Emmanuel) and He calls us His friend (John 15:15) and we can come as we are. But I also believe that we are called to come before Him with an appropriate reverence (Hebrews 12:28). One such example of flippancy is on p. 88: "Powells is another church to me, a paperback sort of heaven." Now, I LOVE Powells Books in Portland, and I am an avid reader. I think reading is a wonderful gift that God has given us. I also believe that you can worship God anywhere. But Miller's statement here, seems to me more like he's worshiping books and reading...it smacks to me of idolatry.

Miller also seems to be content being "in the world, but not of it," but that contentment seemed a bit like complacency when it comes to sharing his faith. On page 115, he recounts a conversation where he is asked to defend his Christianity and refuses. 1 Peter 3:15 tells us to "Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect." I'm the first to confess that many Christians today aren't doing this with gentleness and respect, and I need to search my own heart as I share my faith with others. But, when God opens a door and someone is flat-out asking why you believe, why would you refuse?

Okay...now here's the one that really got under my skin. In fact, I got so angry after reading this, I almost put down the book for good.

In the churches I used to go to, I felt like I didn't fit in. I always felt like the adopted kid, as if there was "room at the table for me." Do you know what I mean? I was accepted but not understood. There was room at the table for me, but I wasn't in the family. p. 130

What a horrible, horrible, HORRIBLE picture of adoption. And definitely not the picture that God gives us in Ephesians 1:5 where He says that He has adopted us as sons. Does God really look at me, His child by adoption, and say, "She's not really in the family"?

He could have made the point that today's church could do a better job accepting everyone with a different analogy. But when you bring such a wrong picture of adoption to the table as your analogy...well, my blood is boiling again, so I'll move on...

Actually, I think I'll set this aside and finish my thoughts in the next blog post.

Stay tuned...

Surgery, Sutures, and a Very Silly Girl

2011-06-17T10:44:00.000-07:00

Dayna had her third surgery last week. This one was pretty minor compared to the others. She had her ear tubes removed and a little bit of scar tissue removed from her lip.

The week before surgery, I was praying very hard for Dayna...praying that she would not fear, but trust God; praying that she would be comfortable; praying that she would heal quickly; praying that she would not be frustrated by her dietary restrictions after the procedure. There were some prayers thrown out there for me as well...

The weekend before surgery, we went grocery shopping and bought all sorts of soft foods that Dayna might like: instant grits, flavored oatmeal, cottage cheese, yogurt, mashed potato flakes, pudding, jello, bomb pops, macaroni and cheese...you get the picture. Dayna was pretty excited about her "special" foods.

Two days before surgery (Monday), I took Dayna shopping for some special pajamas. Really, this was a practicality issue, as all of her pajamas pull over her head...not a good thing after facial surgery. While we were shopping, Dayna turned to me and said, "I wish we didn't have a Tuesday this week...then it would be WEDNESDAY!!!" I asked why she was so excited about Wednesday, and she replied, "I'll get to have SURGERY!!!!!" (She's pretty excited when she talks to you.) I asked why she was excited for surgery, and she gave me that look (the one like "don't you know anything, Mom?") and said in a slightly exasperated tone, "It's not like I get to do this everyday."

So...I no longer had to worry about her fear. The morning of surgery, we made it to the hospital bright and early. The plastic surgeon is the same one who did her lip and palate repair. We absolutely LOVE Dr. Hollins. The ENT is the father of 3 of my former (and dare I say favorite) students. Only the anesthesiologist was an unknown. When we got there, I was thrilled to find out that Dr. Kolb would be the anesthesiologist. He is the head of our craniofacial team, as well as the director of our local international adoption clinic. Dr. Kolb is also the father of 10, 8 of whom are adopted internationally. I couldn't have asked for a better trio to be working on my little girl.

Well, her procedure went very well. She was a little dazed and dozy for most of the morning; we dealt with headaches for quite awhile. Finally, we were able to get Dayna up and about, which helped her headaches. She really just wanted to lay in the hospital bed all day and watch movies (I guess "it's not like she gets to do this everyday"). In fact, we had a very hard time getting Dayna to agree to come home. She wanted to stay overnight!

The next day, we went up to Dan's folks'. We figured it's always more fun to recover at Grandma and Grandpa's house than to sit at home.

Well, we're one week post-op. Dr. Hollins removed the last of her sutures yesterday. Dayna has been cleared to eat regular foods again. And what did she ask to eat this morning for breakfast?

Oatmeal.

Silly girl!

Squishy Face

Coloring before the surgery

Before - notice the happy grin; the little bump in her top lip is about to disappear

She will take any reason to snuggle - so will I

After - she had a remarkably small amount of swelling

I notice that Dan took her blankie AND her stuffed starfish

Sleeping it off

Awake, but still dazed

Finally up and about - going to the playroom

Resting at home, watching "Kung Fu Panda"

3 days post-op

7 days post-op

Crock Pot Pie

2011-06-15T17:32:00.000-07:00

Okay, I was skeptical at first when a friend posted this link. Then I was intrigued...

So I made my own crock pot rhubarb pie today.

I made my own crust (I just really, really, really have an aversion to frozen pie crusts). I placed that on the bottom of my crock pot, with the edges going up at least one inch on all sides. I let that cook for 1 1/2 hours on high.

It was surprisingly golden brown. Not soggy like I expected.

Then I found the rhubarb pie recipe in my trusty Betty Crocker cookbook. I mixed 6 cups of rhubarb, 2 cups of sugar and 2/3 cups of flour. I poured the filling into the cooked pie crust and allowed it to continue cooking for another 1 1/2 hours on low.

It worked! Really well. The crust was flaky, the filling was a bit runny (but not soupy; you win some and lose some with fruit pies.) Scoop some vanilla ice cream on top, and it was absolutely perfect.

I've had 2 pieces today already!

So...the next time it's just too hot to crank up the oven and make a pie, this might just be a winner for you as well.

True Confessions: Housework

2011-06-13T12:57:00.001-07:00

I'm not a good housekeeper. At all. I detest housekeeping. I have no motivation.

I like a clean house; I just don't like putting in the effort to get it that way. Keeping it that way is a challenge as well.

So, last month, we had out of town guests. My guest room and my sewing room are one and the same. (2 halves to one large room.) We let them have our room, because the guest room wasn't habitable. Before Easter, I had to pull out a card table and extra sewing machine to make Dayna's dress because I couldn't get to my sewing room.

So...the logical thing would be to roll up my sleeves and just dig in.

I've never been accused of being logical.

But, we will be having overnight guests next week. I don't want to have to go through this again. So, after some brainstorming and hard work (thanks, Dan), I now have a habitable guest room. The sewing room...that's another story.

This One's for My Mom

2011-05-27T08:41:00.001-07:00

Apparently, I haven't been very good about getting pictures to my mom. She's been great this year, making a lot of darling outfits for Dayna. So, here are some pictures of some of her great creations:
The Zebra dress: Dan is not a fan of animal print, and would never let me get clothing for Dayna with animal print; Nana to the rescue! (Because what's Dan going to say to his mother-in-law...really?)
Dayna's Christmas dress at her school program. This is a picture with Mrs. Bebout, her music teacher.

Dayna at the Ashland Fine Arts Festival. She was so sweet that night!

I LOVE this skirt! So fun...it is reversible (brown with polka dots on the inside) and filled with just enough teal netting to make it really, really poofy! The children on the skirt are of every race and color.

Dayna calls this her "fall" dress, or her "apple" dress. It's a darling corduroy. Her Bitty Baby (Lucy) has a similar dress (red with apples). They went together to an American Girl tea party before Christmas.

Thanks, Mom for the great clothes. Sorry I was such a flake about getting you pictures.

Last Day of Kindergarten

2011-05-27T08:37:00.000-07:00

Today is Dayna's last day of Kindergarten. All year, I have been sending special encouraging notes to Mrs. Starns on this pad of paper. Dayna has been instructed not to use this paper.

Well, today, I let her write her own encouraging thank you note to Mrs. Starns. The spelling is creative, but I think you'll get the idea.

And just in case you need help with the translation:

"Dear Mrs. Starns:

You have been a great teacher to me. You have taught the kids about reading and writing and comprehension strategies. Again you have to me love (?).

Love Dayna"

Of Pots and Potters, Reprise

2011-05-27T08:23:00.000-07:00

Just a review of some struggles I had last winter:

http://wilson24-15.blogspot.com/2010/12/of-pots-and-potters.html

So while Dayna was painting pottery for her birthday, I was making a project of my own.

The song is "Amazing Grace"

The reminder is that when the Potter chooses to thump me, my heart should sing:

...because if I just go "thunk", the Potter will have to put me back through the fire until I'm ready. So...what choice will I make?

Keeping the Tooth Fairy Busy

2011-05-27T08:18:00.000-07:00

Dayna has lost her bottom two teeth now! The tooth fairy pillow belonged to Dan when he was a boy. The tooth fairy has been bringing Dayna the gold dollar coins. Pretty cool of the tooth fairy! (Even better that Dayna's dad has been on the ball and communicating with the tooth fairy, as I've been a bit out of it this month!)

Gotcha Day! 5 years

2011-05-27T08:04:00.001-07:00

We took Dayna roller skating for her Gotcha Day this year. Can't believe it's been five years!

Playing Wii with Monty and Katie

2011-05-27T07:43:00.000-07:00

May the Force be With You!

Dayna is Six!

2011-05-27T07:25:00.001-07:00

Birthday with a Friend

2011-05-27T07:10:00.000-07:00

It's Been a Month...

2011-05-27T06:34:00.000-07:00

It's been one of those incredibly busy months, and I'm behind in my blogging. So, if you'll indulge me, I'll follow this post with several photo posts. (Because pictures are fun, and I still have to make it to ten posts this month!)

May 1: Sweet Dayna's birthday. Six years old! You know, birthdays are really exciting for little girls, but I confess, I find Dayna's birthday to be a difficult day. There's always a bittersweet feeling that her birthday belongs to another woman. Somewhere across the ocean, there's a woman whose heart is bruised and breaking at the memory of giving birth to a child she wouldn't get to raise. Memories of a 2-day-old face that she will more than likely never see again (this side of heaven...we're praying about that!) A birthday is a very intimate time where biology is very strong, and this isn't something I can give my daughter. I have other days with Dayna that are "mine", but the birthday...it just doesn't belong to me.

But for Dayna, the birthday was quite exciting! This is a "non-party" year (we've chosen certain years for parties) and so we let Dayna choose a friend, an activity and a restaurant. She chose a school friend to paint pottery with, followed by lunch at China Wall (a local restaurant we've discovered where all the employees are from Fujian Province.) She really wanted a Silvermist cake, so I *gasp* purchased a small cake at Wal-Mart for this celebration.

The next day, Dan's parents came down from Norfolk and we had a family celebration. I did make a cake for this one (from a box...I am slipping now that I'm working full-time outside the home). However, it was pretty and tasty, so everyone was happy. Dayna wanted a lemon cake with lemon frosting. Yum!

May 5: Farewell...

I had the privilege of having the most amazing student teacher for the last quarter of the year. Angelina was beyond competent, and not only did she relieve a lot of the stress I've experienced this year, but she also became a friend. There just really aren't words for the positive experience that this was, but May 5th was a bittersweet day as I had to say goodbye to a young woman who had pretty much become my right arm. However, I'm happy to report that she was offered a job for next year that was exactly what she wanted.

May 6-8: The world started spinning.

During my afternoon classes on Friday afternoon, I noticed bright spots in my peripheral vision. Within about a half hour, I had no peripheral vision at all and I was very sensitive to light. So, with the lights off in my classroom, I made it through the afternoon. After school, I was helping set up for the school carnival. It was warm, and the gym was very stuffy. I had a raging headache, and suddenly everything went black. I grabbed a table, and it kept me from going down. My principal saw it, fed me some Excedrin Migraine, and sent me home about 30 minutes later. We had company for the weekend, but I still managed about a 4 hour nap on Saturday. I was figuring I had a migraine on Friday, and just needed to sleep it off. Sunday after church, we all went out to lunch for Mother's Day. After lunch, in the parking lot, I missed the curb and lost my balance. I'm finally getting over some lower back problems that have plagued me for 5 months, and the last thing I wanted to do was fall and throw it out again. So I looked down, planted both feet firmly, and looked back up. When I moved my head up, everything went black again and I collapsed in the middle of the parking lot.

At this point, I was getting pretty scared. So I made an appointment early in the week. The doctor decided to treat me for vertigo (even though I wasn't presenting the "typical" symptoms) for several days to see if my dizziness would clear. If not, we were looking at an MRI. Well, the vertigo meds pretty much left me feeling like I was teaching underwater. I wouldn't take them before I drove, but once I'd get home after school, I'd go straight to bed. So...I don't remember much of that week, other than I was dizzy and had a splitting headache. The good news is that it seems to have all cleared up at this point, and I'm doing okay. No need for an MRI!!!

May 16-20: The school year wound down with some interesting wrinkles. There was yet another unusual student situation (thank goodness for a principal who supports me!) And we found out on the last day of school that one of my principals (quite possibly the best boss I have EVER had) got transferred. We are all stunned and devastated at that school. I am truly happy for her, as this new school is a great opportunity for her; but selfishly, I just want her to stay.

And in the meantime: Dayna has lost her first two teeth, Bible Study Fellowship has ended for another year, Birth Mother's Day has come and gone, and now we're getting ready to go on vacation.

No wonder I'm tired! Enjoy the pictures in the next few posts.

Sshhhhh......

2011-05-15T06:14:00.000-07:00

......the house is quiet, and I've been the only one awake for over an hour.

*insert contented sigh*

Okay. The moment's over...time to get up and face my day.

Heaven and Cheesy Bliss

2011-04-30T19:57:00.000-07:00

It seems odd to label a post "faith" and "cooking", but here we are...

The other day, Dan was lamenting the fact that there will be no sun or moon in heaven (Isaiah 60:19), which may likely point to no more weather patterns. Now, Dan LOVES weather. Particularly severe weather (though not as severe as our nation has seen in the past week or so). As our conversation continued, I tried to find a way to show him that God has it all under control. If there is something we love here on earth, He will have something even better to take its place in the New Earth.

So I thought of macaroni and cheese.

Now, the blue box is good. It's comfort food. It's quick, easy, and completely unhealthy. We could spend our lives eating mac and cheese from the blue box, and be happy. If I told you that you could never eat it again, you might even get teary eyed.

That is, until you experience the real stuff. You know what I'm talking about...gooey, cheesy, baked until there's a nice little crust on top (and still probably quite unhealthy). Once you eat the really good stuff, do you really want to go back to the blue box?

I think heaven will be kind of like macaroni and cheese (only it will be good for us!) What we have now is good, but it's just a little taste (pun intended) of what God has in store for us.

So, here's where the cooking part comes in. After this conversation, I got really, really, really hungry for some good macaroni and cheese. I found a recipe online that looked like a winner, but it was bland and had a weird texture. If you have a tried and true macaroni and cheese recipe that's smooth and gooey, but not too gummy...please, let me know!

Dayna's Top Five

2011-04-30T16:08:00.000-07:00

Today is Dayna's last day as a five-year-old. I asked her what her top five things were about being five.

1. Getting to start Bible Study Fellowship.

2. Learning how to swim and not be afraid in the pool.

3. Starting Kindergarten.

4. Earning her own money (sorry...couldn't find a pic, but you can see our system here.)
5. Going to Disney World.

Five has been fun...but it's time to move on.

Dayna's Easter Preparations

2011-04-28T19:34:00.001-07:00

We started with pin curls the night before.
The Easter Bunny wrote back to Dayna. You can see her letter here. The Easter Bunny DID indeed bring Peeps...He brought sponge curlers, too. Hurray for no more pin curls!
Uber curls!
They did relax as the day went on.
Her finished Easter dress. There's a matching purse, too, but somehow it didn't end up in the picture.
It's so much fun to be a little girl at Easter!

Easter Eggs and All That Jazz

2011-04-28T19:19:00.000-07:00

We had a great Easter weekend. On Saturday, we traditionally color eggs at a local country church. Sunday afternoon, our friends Ted and Nora invited us over for a very yummy brunch and egg hunt in their backyard.

Enjoy the pictures.
Our friend Nora bought the kids bunny teeth pacifiers...thanks, Nora...
Our friends provided the ultimate in Easter egg hunting...the super-camo egg.

Our friend Janice taught Dayna how to bend decorative grass into crosses.

Superhero Daddy

2011-04-24T16:58:00.000-07:00

Sometimes a superhero can wear a cape. It takes a very special superhero to be able to wear a ladybug cape.

But not every superhero can fly faster than a speeding bullet. Not every superhero can leap tall buildings in a single bound. Not every superhero gets to drive a super-fast Batmobile through the streets of Gotham City.

But a true superhero...he leads his family.

This is my superhero after dinner the other night.

Dear Easter Bunny

2011-04-19T15:28:00.000-07:00

Dayna got it in her head to write a letter to the Easter Bunny today. All spelling, capitalization and punctuation (or lack thereof) is hers:

Dear Easter bunny can you get me and my Dad Daniel sum mrshmelow Peeps and please hid as much Easter Eggs for My famuly can find. My name is speld D-a-y-n-a You usually hear it like this D-a-n-a but its D-a-y-n-a.

I sure hope she gets everything she wants :)

That's What Mommies Do

2011-04-18T05:38:00.000-07:00

It's been a rough few days at the Wilson house...mostly due to lack of wisdom in parenting and lack of self-control in childhood. So, as Dan & I pray about how to handle this latest phase (please God, let this just be a phase!) I think back to one of Dayna's favorite phrases when we ask why she does something..."That's what Daynas do!"

So this morning, I popped this little poem in Dayna's lunchbox:

I will love you when you're grumpy.

I will love you when you're mad.

I will love you when you're happy.

I will love you when you're sad.

I will love you when you're snuggly,

And when you're mean and argue too.

I will ALWAYS love my Dayna,

Because that's what Mommies do!